Really, who do I need to sleep with??

I have this boss

He has many personalities

Sometimes, I think he is great. He can really come through in the clutch, like when I called him from Savannah, Ga dying from a sinus infection and he called in a prescription for a Z-pak without question.

Then there are days like today

He fancies himself quite the comedian I think. He comes into my operatory to do an exam on my patient, who just happens to be one of his best friends. They exchange their little pleasantries and inquiries as to where they will go have lunch after. He, for the zillionth time, tells our patient that he wants to do porcelain veneers on 6 of his front teeth.

The patient wants to know if the price has come down, like, you know, "calculators." Or is it going up up UP like everything else in our economy. We all laugh...

Then Dr. Butthole goes on to tell him that his expenses have gone up, lab fees have gone up, MY salary has gone up (???)

"It HAS???" I ask incredulously.

"Yes, 5 bucks, remember." (Oh yeah, dickhead, I remember that slap in the face)

My eyes roll so far back into my head I see black spots and my fingers go numb!

"Better than a poke in the eye," he laughs at his own unfunny.

Little does he know that we three hygienists have already started "circling the wagons" as it were. We have been talking since the day we got those big ol' honking raises of how we will be presenting a united front next "raise season" or like we say in America, January. To say we'll be storming the castle would be putting it mildly. We've already been making notes, separately, of all the little extras we perform around the office. Procedures that we do on our time that honestly, the assistants should be doing. Procedures that make money for them, but do we see any profit? NO.

I've taken more full mouth Xrays in the last six months than any of the back office girls, but then, their Xrays are diagnostic CRAP!! It's better for me to do it. How about a little something extra? You know, for the effort.

Ammunition. It's a wonderful thing!

Be afraid! Be very afraid!!!